Dear Thalia,

I recently moved to the Bay area from a small town on the east coast to teach dance.

I'm 32 and have dated older butch women exclusively since college, when I came out and I'm a total femme. I'm starting to experiment with the BDSM scene, leather etc.

What advice would you have for me to stay safe as I explore the BDSM scene in my new town?

Sincerely,

All Tied Up

Dear Thalia,

My girlfriend and I have been talking about spicing up our lovemaking routine with a toy. Neither one of us has any experience with any toys so we're totally overwhelmed.  Where do we start?

Sincerely,

Treasure Chest

Dear Thalia,

Every time I have sex I have to jump up and run to the bathroom and pee immediately afterward. This drives my girlfriend nuts because she wants to cuddle in the afterglow of lovemaking.  But I just can't stay.  I have to go and listen to her protests the whole time.  I totally get what she's saying.  It destroys the mood when I jump up and run away.  What causes the urge and is there anything I can do stop it?

Sincerely,

Flushing